SINGLE OF THE DAY
S*M*A*S*H: (I Want To) Kill Somebody
(Hi Rise)

S*M*A*S*H: murderous economists

Somewhere near the end of this, Ed S*M*A*S*H appears to be on the brink of losing it. Really. His vocals are all over the shop: out of tune, out of time and out of place.

And why not?

See, sometimes it just gets too f----ing much. You stagger through this pitiful existence, full of heaving point with hatred for the world and loathing for yourself, condemned to perpetually kick arse simply to get even slightly ahead. And every now and again an anti-nonce song turns up to soundtrack every head-shaking, hand-wringing, soul-destroying moment of your life.

'(I Want To) Kill Somebody' is - much like, yet wildly removed from Oasis' 'Live Forever' - S*M*A*S*H's trump card. No other song encapsulates the trio's rage so brutally, so beautifully. On this four-track effort (released for one day only, remember), there is a Le Blanc dance mix (junglist, hectic and strange), a Gunshot rap mix (heavy, hectic and odd) and a solo acoustic version, designed for the more esoteric busker, presumably.

All of which is fine, but nothing can compare with the sheer axe-slashing vitality and political fury of the 'original'. The words are machine-gunned out by a livid Ed. The music is frantically spectacular, bolstered by some decent equipment (at last) and seems to last, ooooh, three seconds. The boring tosswits super-glued to the bar are whingeing on about this anti-Tory rant being "passé" and, as ever, their heads are so far up their own arses they could suck their own tonsils.

Because they are the same people who belched into their Badger's Brew and farted on about 'Killing in the Name' being "too obvious", oblivious to the fact that "F--- you I won't do what you tell me!" is equally applicable to various day-to-day aardvark-buggering DISASTERS as it is too mental governments.

Because they are the same people who blithely lumber on about S*M*A*S*H being retro Palitoy boys to the Clash's adult education system, having never seen the bootleg video from the 100 Club last year when, come the deathwish list of "Margaret Thatcher, Jeffery Archer, Michael Heseltine, John Major, Virginia Bottomley… especially!", Ed is in tears.

And because - here's the crux - they could never appreciate any spittle-stewn mess of a song that actually manages to incorporate the line "Gill Shepherd's got an appalling unemployment record!" which somehow success in being both hilarious and horrendous AT THE SAME TIME.

Can I say that S*M*A*S*H put the WOW! Into NWONW? No? Oh, alright then.

F---ing brilliant.