News Tue, 17 Apr 2007 17:36:41 CST Vu

What matters to me: Louise Wener
Last updated: 14-Apr-07 02:06 BST
written by GABY SOUTAR

What's the best bit on your personality CV?
To my friends and the people I love I am fiercely loyal and kind. I'm a good drunk. A fine host. A good listener. I am freakishly calm in a crisis.

And the worst?
I'm a nightmare in the mornings after too little sleep. I'm pessimistic. I'm a glass-half-empty kind of person.

What are your earliest memories?
Being told off in front of the whole school when I was five and wetting my pants in the assembly hall. Summers that were always sunny and hot. Being stung by a wasp and my mum putting vinegar on it.

Describe yourself as a food/car/drink.
Pomegranate/Rolls-Royce/Vimto.

How do you stay in love?
Don't over analyse it. It's so easy to pick things apart. Don't work together. Don't employ a sexy au pair.

Is money the root of all evil?
Of course not, that would be estate agents. And religion. And communism. And astrology. And Jim Carrey.

What keeps you up at night?
My toddler teething. My upstairs neighbours' television. Wondering if it's OK to be sceptical about global warming or any cultural orthodoxy these days.

Who or what makes you laugh?
Larry David in Curb Your Enthusiasm. My daughter learning to speak.

Who's your biggest influence?
My family. My parents. My friends. Upstairs Downstairs. Spandau Ballet. Richard Feynman. The Fonz. Madonna, in the six months when she was interesting.

What object would you save in a fire?
My daughter's toadstool fairy house. She'd be devastated to lose it. The thing I plug into the side of my laptop to save updated versions of my new novel at the end of the day.

What was your life's main turning point?
Answering an ad for a singer in a band when I first went to college. Learning to play the guitar. Buying a typewriter. Having a baby.

Perfect Sunday?
A lie in, a fry up, the papers, a long bath, a walk in the park, a long lunch with friends and kids, an early film, a great dinner, a night in a karaoke booth. Ideally this would all take place somewhere beautiful and hot, and be interspersed with cocktails, poker and swimming.